Shattered
by Blaidd Du
Summary: "Please, Jazz ... You have to come home - NOW ! Something really bad's happened. You really need to get back here. It's Jaco- " I got no further. My brother's roar of anguished pain rang in my ears. Then all I heard was static.


**Disclaimer:** Sadly, Jasper and Jacob continue to belong to Stephenie Meyer - although my offer of a good home _still_ stands !  
><strong>Warning:<strong> contains some strong language and slash implied.  
><strong><br>A/N:** i) Jasper and Alice are just siblings and best friends in my little AU. Also, Jacob _never_ imprints on Renesmee - so _not_ happening in my little world;  
>ii) Thoughts are in <em>italics.<em>

_**XXXXXXXXX**_

**Shattered**

_**Alice's pov:**_

_Oh, Lord ! I'm dreading this ... Why me ? Why do __I__ have to tell him ? I hate having to be the one to do it. To give the person I care about the most, news that will devastate him. This is going to break him ... __He's__ fragile enough as it is ..._

Sighing deeply and with a heavy heart, I glare at my cellphone then slowly begin to dial _his_ number. The length of time which passes seems interminable and the knowledge of what I have to say greatly saddens me. If I were human ... well, lets just say that by now I'd be feeling extremely nauseous.

_Come on ... Come on ... Where the fuck are you ? Pick u-_

"Oh, thank God !" I sighed in relief as I finally heard his soft Southern drawl. "Where the hell have you been, Jazz ? I've been trying to get hold of you for the past hou- "

"Hey ! Ali, calm down ... What's wrong, sis ?" Even over the phone, my beloved brother was completely in tune with my emotions and could instantly tell something was preying on my mind.

"Please, Jazz ... You have to come home - _NOW ! _Something really bad's happened. You really need to get back here. It's Jaco- " I got no further. My brother's roar of anguished pain rang in my ears. Then all I heard was static.

Jasper was coming home ...

_**XXXXX**_

_**Jasper's pov:**_

I could tell the moment I heard my sister's voice that something was wrong. Something she didn't want to tell me, because she didn't want to cause me pain. That's what I love the most about Ali. There are times when she can be the biggest pain in my ass, but when it really matters, she'll do anything and everything in her power to watch my back. To protect me. Simply because she loves me ...

I never thought I was capable of running so fast. But as soon as Alice started to say Jake's name, I began to move. My attention was firmly fixed on getting home. Nothing else mattered. Except Jacob. Only my Jake.

The surrounding landscape became a blur. A mass of swirling colour. Shades of green, brown, grey and blue. I'd been away for two days. Jake had insisted that I go and hunt. He'd seen how badly I needed to feed, despite my protests that I was fine. But my Quileute wolf is wise and observant. He may only be sweet sixteen, impulsive, full of fire and life, yet he carries an old head on his impressively broad, young shoulders.

Knowing full well how stubborn I can be, Jake cunningly played the ace up his sleeve; he threatened to withhold _all_ "fun and games" and sexual favours until I fed. He was well aware that was something - or rather _he _was something - I'd never be able to resist indefinitely. That denying me the pleasures of his bed and his gorgeous body, was like depriving humans of oxygen or an addict of his drug of choice. In the end, I yielded. Gave in to his wishes. I agreed to go, because I knew it would please him.

And just to give me further incentive, he drew me close, his warm, sensuous lips nuzzled my throat. Long, silky, blue-black hair tantalizingly brushed my sensitive flesh every time his strapping frame moved against my slighter body. Strong, muscular thighs ground into mine. Large, powerful, beautifully-shaped, russet hands firmly gripped my lean, pale hips as he rubbed his hard, thick, heated dick against my equally aroused, ice-cold member. We both moaned softly, desperately craving friction and release.

Then Jake whispered huskily, "If you go, babe, I promise to make it worth your while when you get back ... _Really _worth your while, Jazz. You won't regret it, I swear ..."

It had been an offer I couldn't refuse and I'd have been crazy not to take it.

But now, I deeply regretted my decision. After Ali's call, I wished to God I hadn't allowed my dick to overrule both my heart and my head. That I'd stayed home. With Jake. And kept him safe ...

_**XXXXX**_

I burst through the front door of our home, full of trepidation and worry, and headed for the living room. As soon as I entered the house I could smell wolf. Two of them. One was definitely the scent of wet dog in mud. The other faint, yet alluring. The unmistakable aroma of fresh pine needles, wildflowers, spices and summer rain. It belonged to my very adorable, extremely sexy Jacob.

I entered the living room and saw a very upset Esme sitting on the couch and was startled to find an equally distressed, gangly, sandy coloured wolf nestled close at her side. Its handsome head lay on her lap and it whimpered mournfully. The distraught beast trembled violently and Esme absently stroked its thick pelt in an attempt to soothe it. I recognized the mutt immediately. It was a member of the pack. Jake's friend. The one he saw as a much loved, younger brother. Seth.

Before I could say anything, I was swept into a miniature whirlwind's embrace. Alice had her arms wrapped tightly around me and I was immediately struck by the intensity of her emotions. Fear. Anxiety. Worry. Despair. And love.

"Oh, thank God ! You made it ..."

The sincere relief in her voice was palpable, but for once, her animated, beautiful face was grave and desolate. Her golden eyes were fixed intently upon mine and were full of compassion and sorrow. And for the first time in over a hundred and forty years, I began to feel dread. Genuine, spine-chilling, all-consuming, paralysing terror. I began to fear the worst. That I'd lost him. My mate ... My heart. My soul. My conscience ... The love of my life - or I should say, unlife ... My precious, beautiful, brave warrior. My Jake ...

"Wh-Where ... ?" I found myself struggling to get the words out. Pain and fear were crippling my voice. Preventing me from speaking properly. Leaving me tongue-tied. A hostage to my worst nightmare - losing my lover. "Ali ... Where's m-my wolf ? Where's Jacob ? I need to see him ... I want to see him ..."

Alice's eyes flickered briefly to meet Esme's before hesitantly meeting mine. I saw Esme's anxious gaze dart towards the staircase. I could feel how deeply saddened she was and noted that she'd bit down firmly on her lower lip, something she tended to do when she was extremely upset or worried. Her slim, elegant hand shook as she continued to stroke Seth's pale, sleek fur. The fact that she couldn't even speak conveyed the strength of her feelings for Jacob and whatever had happened to him had affected her intensely.

From the moment they'd met, Esme and Jacob had a rapport. A bond. They'd formed an instant and mutual liking and respect for each other, which hadn't taken long to evolve into caring and love. And now, for the first time since I'd known her, my normally serene, unflappable "mother" was shaken to her core. She seemed devastated. And that, frankly, scared the hell out of me ...

I was halfway up the stairs before I realized it, ignoring Alice's soft cries to "_Wait ! _"

I stood outside my bedroom door, trembling. I could feel my lover's presence there, but it was slowly, yet surely fading. I both longed and dreaded to see him. I yearned for Jake, yet feared what I would be confronted with once I opened the door. Although, it was unnecessary, I found myself gasping deeply for breath and in order to stop the swiftly rising panic I felt, I rested my forehead against the door and desperately tried to calm down.

Then, after a brief moment to regain my composure and having decided to bite the proverbial bullet, I slowly opened the door and entered the dimly lit room ...

_**XXXXX**_

At first, I could've sworn the body which lay flat and perfectly still upon my bed was a corpse. That I'd been too late ... That my sweet, adorable Jacob was dead. If I'd been human, I would've keeled over in shock. As it was, I clung weakly to the door, staring in disbelief at the sight in front of me.

Jake lay on his back, the lower part of his body covered by a white sheet. Seeing my beautiful, hyperactive wolf lifeless, battered and broken was the worst thing I'd ever been subjected to. What had been smooth, russet skin which had felt like warm silk, now had a deathly, ashen tint and every part of his strong, glorious body was marred with severe bruises. No matter where I looked, he'd been hurt - badly.

Haltingly, I approached the bed. The closer I got to him, I could feel my control slipping away and the familiar red mist of rage began to consume me. Someone, or something, had gone out of their way to viciously and sadistically hurt my mate. And signed their own death warrant in the process. It didn't matter if Jake survived or not ... Whoever had been arrogant enough, insane, suicidal or just plain stupid to attack him had incurred my wrath. And I wouldn't rest until Jake had been avenged ...

Seeing the thick rope burn which cut brutally into and around his neck was sickening. My gaze skimmed over Jake's body and I literally saw red as I took in the healing bullet wounds to his chest and gut. I ran a trembling hand through my messy blond hair and inhaled deeply, catching the faint trace of Jacob's blood in the air as I did so.

Various emotions conflicted violently within me. Fear that my beloved mate was barely clinging to life; a murderous rage towards his assailant; guilt and distress that I hadn't been with him when he needed me the most. That I'd failed to protect the one person who was my world. The one who saved me from the dark and brought much needed light into my life. He freed my soul. Made me believe in myself. Made me feel joy, passion and warmth. Made me love deeply, unconditionally, wholeheartedly and passionately. Jake was everything to me and made me a better person. I _wanted _to be a better person for him. I wanted to be worthy of him. Of his trust. His faith in me. And most important of all ? I wanted more than anything to be worthy of _his_ love.

Seeing him like this, suffering and hurting, filled me with overwhelming pain. He'd endured what could only be classed as torture. Pure and simple. And I ached for my wolf. I may not have suffered his agony and torment, but I sure as hell felt it now.

"Oh, Jake ..." I whispered huskily, closing my eyes in sorrow. "What the fuck happened to you ? Who did this to you, darlin' ?"

"We've no idea what happened to him, Jazz. Illegal hunters or poachers, Seth thought, but he couldn't be sure."

Startled, I spun around to find my sister leaning against the doorframe. She appeared smaller. Fragile. Vulnerable. Full of sympathy and anguish. And I could also sense a faint undercurrent of anger within her. Anger towards whoever had hurt Jake. And strangely, blame. Blame towards herself.

"I blame myself, Jazz. I never saw this. Never knew this would happen to him. If I'd only known ... I'd have done anything to prevent him from patrolling this afternoon. I'd have kept him here. Safe. I hate seeing Jake like this. In so much pain. It's wrong and it hurts 'cause I don't know if he's going to make it or not ... Jake's family. Daft mutt's like a brother to me and I love him. If anything happens to him, I'll _never_ forgive myself ..."

As much as I wanted someone or something to blame for what had happened to Jake, I couldn't hold Alice responsible for it. Genuine remorse and pain came off her in waves. She'd spoken the truth. No harm would have fallen on Jacob if Alice had known. She'd have made damn sure of it and would've willingly sacrificed herself to ensure his safety and my happiness.

I felt her tiny, delicate hand take hold of mine, its long, slim fingers lacing with my own, in a gesture of mutual comfort.

"I'm so sorry, Jasper ..." she whispered, laying her dark head to rest against my upper right arm. "I just can't believe this has happened. Not to Jake. He's one of the strongest people I've ever met. Who the hell would want to hurt him so badly ? This isn't fucking fair. To him. Or to you. Not when you've both just found each other. I think the world of your mutt and I love how happy he's made you. You're good for each other ... and I'm damned if I'm going to let whoever did this get away with it !"

The ferocity in Alice's voice startled me, yet I took comfort in her words and the depth of her feelings for Jacob. If anything, when it came to the ones my sister cared for and loved, she would fight and defend them like a lioness protecting her cubs.

"Jake hasn't moved or responded at all. To anything. Carlisle's worried. Doesn't know if he'll make it- "

"Where's Carlisle ?" I demanded, thinking it was strange that I hadn't seen him. "Why isn't he here ?"

"He went back to the hospital. To get some things for Jake. More blood. Painkillers. Morphine. You know ... stuff that could help ..." She carefully disentangled her fingers from mine and sighed heavily. "I should go and check on how Seth's doing. He's the one who found Jake. He crossed the boundary to bring him here. I've never seen the Cub look so scared or so worried ... Unless you want me to stay ... ?"

I slowly shook my head. I just wanted to be alone with my wolf. "Nah, go ... See if he's ok ... And Ali ?"

She stood in front of me, her head tilted to one side and a quizzical look on her pretty face, "Yeah ?"

"Tell him thanks ... For bringing Jake here. Back home to me. Tell him I won't forget what he did."

Alice gave a silent nod in acknowledgement and left.

I turned and with a heavy heart approached the bed. Fearing the worst. Dreading it. Consumed by an intense grief and awareness that I was about to lose the one that meant everything to me. The one I loved and was still desperately in love with. Now it was all just a matter of time. How long I had with him. Time that was so precious and which was slowly, yet swiftly but surely, slipping away at a frightening pace ... if that made any kind of sense.

I toed off my cowboy boots and socks and slid onto the bed beside him, taking his hand in mine, my thumb making absent circles on his warm skin. I watched him avidly, not wanting to take my eyes off him in case he slipped away without my knowledge. Even in his bloody, battered and bruised state my Jacob was still undeniably beautiful.

Taking great care, I curved myself around him, placed his hand over my heart and continued to study him intently. I'm not sure whether I was fooling myself or not, but I could've sworn that there was a slight tint of colour to his pale cheeks. I shook my head in disbelief. I had to be suffering from a severe case of wishful thinking. There was no other explanation for it. With a heavy sigh, I closed my eyes and inhaled deeply. To my astonishment, his scent didn't seem as weak as it had been when I'd entered the room. If anything, it was more fragrant. The potent aroma of pine needles, and wildflowers combined with herbs, spices and fresh summer rain assaulted my senses. But I was still convinced that my imagination was playing tricks on me ... until I heard his heartbeat. It was stronger. Steadier. And throbbed in an even rhythm. It was the most beautiful sound I'd ever heard.

What finally made me hesitantly open my eyes was a firm, yet gentle pressure on my hand. Swallowing hard, I turned my head and gasped softly at the sight before me. I bit my lower lip - hard. Felt my fangs pierce through the skin and ice-cold blood slowly trickle down my chin.

"Hey ..."

Warm, limpid, painfilled chocolate eyes locked with my own stunned gold. Jacob smiled faintly.

"Did you miss me, babe ?" His husky voice was soft. He reached out his free hand and rested it against my cheek, the callused ball of his thumb brushing my bottom lip, lightly smearing the blood.

"J-Jake ... ? What the fuck- ?"

If I'd still been alive, I'd have had a coronary on the spot. As it was, all I could do was stare at him in stunned disbelief. Then, as he continued to tenderly caress my cheek, relief began to course through me, making my body tremble uncontrollably. I immediately threw my right arm across his broad chest, nestled close to him, revelling in his warmth and tucked my head under his chin.

"Oh, God ! I honestly thought I was going to lose you ... That I _had_ lost you ... You scared the hell out of me, mutt ..." To my sensitive ears, the low growl I was aiming for sounded very shaky and the more upset I was, the more pronounced my Southern accent became. "Don't think I'd be able to go on if anything happened to you, darlin' ... I _wouldn't _want to ... There'd be no point ..."

I felt his hand move to reassuringly stroke my shoulder. For once, it felt good to have someone calm and soothe me. So good. I melted at his touch and deeply inhaled his intoxicating scent.

"Nothing's going to happen to me, Jazz. I love you so much. You're my heart. My soul. My love. I could never leave you without a fight. You're everything to me ... I know you're my imprint and I'm your mate. That we were meant for each other. That my wolf chose you ... But fuck that ! Imprint or no damn imprint, I'd _still_ have chosen you. Wanted to be with you. Despite my inner wolf, you'll always be the one for me. You intrigue me. Challenge me. You're smart, sexy and fun to be with. You manage to bring out the best in me and keep me relatively sane. What's not to love about you ? Even if you are a goddamn leech ..." he teased gently. "So, quit getting your boxers in a bunch. _You're_ saddled with me, lover, for as long as you want me. You sure ain't getting rid of me that easily. When it comes to us, I'm in it for the long haul ... For keeps, babe. 'Cause _I_ want to be and _not_ 'cause of this fucking imprint ..."

His words meant everything to me, but the fact that I'd nearly lost him left me shattered. And I hated feeling weak. Being vulnerable ...

Even though I'd been a major in the Confederate Army, I'd never recognized, known or acknowledged fear. But the nightmarish experience of almost losing my wolf had changed all that. I now knew what fear was. It was something to be dreaded. Respected. And I vowed I'd never take what I had with Jake for granted again. From now on, I was going to love and cherish him and above all, protect him. I swore to myself that I'd never let anything like that happen to him again - ever.

I found myself nestling closer to him, my palm resting over his steadily beating heart and felt warm, firm lips tenderly brush my forehead. I inhaled shakily and gradually the tremors which racked my body began to ease.

"Never do that to me again, darlin' ..." I spoke huskily. "I couldn't take it. Promise me, Jake, that you'll be more careful. I can't lose you ..." I paused to meet his soft dark gaze. "Tell me, there's something I need to know ... Why didn't you wake before now ?"

"Listen, Jazz, as long as I'm able to draw breath, you'll never lose me. Part of that's down to the imprint, the rest's all me, I swear. It's all me ... As for waking up ? Only my imprint can rouse me when I'm healing. The wolf will only respond to you. Your needs. Your wishes. Your love ..."

He shifted on the bed to make himself more comfortable and winced in discomfort. Already his bruises were starting to fade and the cuts beginning to heal. Seeing it happen before my eyes fascinated me. Then again, if I'm honest, everything about my Jake intrigues and enthralls me. I can't help it. I love him. I'm in love with him. And thank God, he feels the same way about me and returns my feelings freely and unreservedly.

Like my wolf said, his feelings go far beyond imprinting. They're real. Natural. Instinctive. And not forced. It isn't "perfect" like a true imprint, where the imprint and imprintee do not fight and they're completely besotted with and see each other through rose-tinted glasses.

Hell ! We fight. A lot. With a great deal of passion and feeling. And the making up afterwards ? Lets just say the way _we _make up, makes all the fighting and bitching worthwhile. If anything, I swear if I didn't know any better, my handsome Quileute often deliberately starts an argument so that we both end up in bed. Always knackered. Extremely sated. And very happy. Our bodies slick with perspiration - well, Jake's at least - and passionately entwined. The perfect russet of his sleek, muscular frame covering my scarred, pale, lithe, sinewy body. My legs wrapped tightly around his lean waist as I'm consumed by love and desire. I cling helplessly to him as his powerful hips thrust relentlessly into me. Pounding mercilessly and hitting my sweet spot with unerring accuracy with every stroke. Until all I can see are stars and Jake ... My wolf. So devastatingly handsome as he's caught up in the throes of passion. All I can do is hang on to him as he takes me for the ride of my (un)life. And I revel in it. Enjoy it. He takes me higher. Makes my spirit fly until I'm soaring as my orgasm has me spiralling out of control. It's like we can't get enough of each other. Every time we make love feels like the first time. Full of excitement, passion, need, desire and love. I've often been accused of being cold. Reserved. But when I'm in Jake's arms, I'm wild. Wanton. Willing. I burn for _him. _For him alone. And_ I _love it. Almost as much as I love him ...

But for now, we're both content to lie in each other's arms. For once, we haven't the energy to do anything else. Except maybe exchange tender, lingering, yet passionate kisses; soft, gentle caresses and words of absolute, unconditional love. I'm shattered. Emotionally drained. And my gorgeous Jake's broken body needs to rest and heal. We both need time to get over this and after seeing my wolf overcome the first hurdle of waking up, I begin to feel hope. Hope and realization that because we aren't human, time for once, is what we have plenty of. I intend to make the most of it and make sure that when it comes to Jacob, I _won't_ waste a single, precious moment ...

**Finis**


End file.
